That For Which Seems Lost

Written by Mathew Naismith

 To lose something that you never

had to lose in the first place to be lost!!

Sounds funny doesn't it? To lose something you thought you could lose if lost. Think of it this way. A couple are married and one of the couple believes the other partner is as deeply in love as they are. After awhile this turns out not to be true. The question is, can one lose someone's love that never really existed before hand? It can if the partner believes their love was reciprocated.

In all honesty though, you can't really lose what you never had to lose in the first place, even when it feels you have lost. In all practicality you had nothing to lose in the first place. It is handy to think philosophically like this when you feel a loss in this way, "I didn't have it in the first place to have lost it"!!

I actually go further with this, in that material life itself isn't something I have or own to be able to lose in the first place, therefore life itself can't be lost to me.

So why do we feel a loss even when we didn't really have the loss to lose in the first place?

Possession = The act of having and controlling property, and, Anything owned or possessed

The feeling of owning something has to do with control. In relation to love, an expected or desired return of love to the same degree. Sadly, often marriage is seen as an ownership so expectations become of desires and of course our desires often have control of over us. It would seem control gives us something to lose even when we don't have anything to become lost in the first place.

How many people today think they have to take control? In this case there is always someone else trying to take control by controlling you, leading to a vicious endless cycle of ownership of control.

Yes, I can feel a material loss, but I know that no material possession really belonged to me to lose in the first place. Sadly, love is often treated as a material possession or something expected or demanded from others. Do I expect to be loved by my wife? No, my wife's love is simply something given by her but not owned by me, it is simply a blessing.